Twisted nursery rhymes
Do you recognise these twisted nursery rhymes by Pat Flynn?
It’s raining, it’s pouring
The old man is snoring
He bumped his head on the back of the bed
And couldn’t get up because he was dead
He floated up to heaven
And met a bloke named Kevin
Who fixed his head, sent him back to bed
Where the old man bumped his head again
Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet
Eating her curds and whey
Along came a spider
Who sat down beside her
And said, “What the heck is a tuffet anyway?”
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king’s horses and all the King’s men
Couldn’t put Humpty together again.
So they hired a consultant who charged a fortune and still couldn’t do it
Hickory, dickory, dock
Two mice ran up the clock
The clock struck one
The mouse said, “Ouch!”
Hickory, dickory, dock
Hickory, dickory, dock
Two mice ran up the clock
The clock struck two
And down they flew
Hickory, dickory, dock
Pussycat, pussycat
Where have you been?
I’ve been up to London
To visit the Queen.
Pussycat, pussycat
What did you there?
“Australia should be a republic,” I did declare.
